Boss Warnings

I was running through the lovely green forests of Aslan Valley when a warning came up on my screen. “You are close to Chester Iron Armor. Please be careful!” Iron Armor? Who the heck is that? I’ve been playing the game since March 2009 and I’ve never heard of him. So of course I go check it out. He’s this big-ass anteater with 260,000 HP.  I keelt him.

When I started playing RoM there used to be no boss warnings. It made for a very realistic yet frustrating game. You were constantly scanning your surroundings for crown bosses, which in reality is what would you would do if you really were in a forest where crazy fish-bone wielding psychos were wandering around looking for someone to flatten. It was a relief when they added the warnings so that a little level 22 could pound away on black boars in peace without worrying about Mr. Ironpants coming up behind her and giving her a raping. (sorry, that’s kinda rude but funny!)

I remember the first time I saw a warning, it was Wild Mane, I was slaughtering wolves near the shore when the warning came up. I froze and looked around. Nothing. I took a step and the warning came up again. Quick, into the lake!!! I swam out and looked up. There’s cute, fuzzy, evil Wild Mane on top of the hill. Phew.  Thought he was sniffing my tail the way those warnings kept coming up!
The same thing happens in the Tower of Wailing Wind. As you’re running up the hallways filled with those nasty gargoyles with a respawn time of 30 seconds, you get the warning about the Explosive Trap. It’s actually way down on the ground. Three dimensional stuff confuses the system I think. Like Kal’Turstan and Kal’Turssi, same deal. They're underground but when you run over them it gives the warning.

But seriously, does anyone else think that some of the naming in this game is a bit ridiculous? I understand that it was originally in Korean and then German and then English but you gotta laugh at some of the names. I’m fully expecting to see this message on my screen one day: “You are close to Clumpy Humperlegg. Please be careful!”

I suppose they’re trying to be original. It wouldn’t be all that scary if it said: "You are close to Doug.” :)

Ooh, new idea. Wouldn’t it be cool if you could have a warning like that in real life? You are close to the boss, please be careful! You are close to your ex-wife. You are close to a cop who’s having a bad day. That would be most excellent.